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| Valentine's flowers 2020 |
Happy Valentine's day everyone! It's been a very long time since I've posted on my blog..maybe a little too long. I'm still here, made some changes in my life and everything is going well.
On my calendar there is a reminder appointment on January 27th simply titled "The day it all started". I added this back in 2010 after everything in my life had settled down, that was the date where the direction of my life changed course forever. Mike doesn't like to see that on our shared calendar as it brings back bad memories of what he, our boys, families and friends went through while I was experienced several surgeries, ICU and hospital stays, and figuring out how to manage my new body and life. I have come to look on January 27th as an accomplishment - that I made it through those surgeries, hospital stays and conquered my new body and figured out how to live my life with some adjustments.
January 27th wasn't the date of my surgery but when blockage started - that first domino fell knocking more down as it went. I knew from the beginning that things were different, it came on faster and hurt much worse ever than before. From needing a friend to drive me home to waking the next morning with no change in the blockage and more pain...things were worse than before. I knew if I called my GI his orders would be to go the ER. I knew this when I called Mike during a normal January tax season day that this is where I was headed. I can't explain it, I just knew. What I didn't know is what those other dominoes had in store for me: TPN, surgery, ICU, ostomy and more TPN, home, back to hospital, more surgery, more ICU, back home again, recovery, figuring out TPN and the ostomy. With the support of Mike, our 3 sons, our families, many nurses and physicians, ThriveRx and their awesome staff and the wonderful people I have met along the way, I not only figured it out, I conquered it.
January 27th is a celebration of life for me. In the be ginning I was worried that I might not see the one year anniversary. Would I watch our boys grow up? Would I live without TPN? Would I enjoy life as before? There were so many "what if's" which we don't remember anymore and I am perfectly fine with that!
Ever since we've been together Mike has sent me roses on Valentine's day but that year I couldn't remember if he had. A little while after I'd been home and memories of bits and pieces of the hospital stays came back to me, I asked Mike if he had sent me flowers that year. He gave me his look of "um did you really just ask me that?" which softened to a look of love and he said "yes I did". I had been in such a fog of pain meds and recovery, I hadn't remembered that. (I don't even know how I talked my surgeon into releasing me 3 short days later in the state I was in!) But I shouldn't have doubted that he wouldn't send me flowers that year while I was the hospital. He sent me those because he loved and missed me, that's the kind of guy he is.
This year, I got my flowers a day early (he knew where I would be all day 😃) so I am sharing them with you. Send your love to those around you who you love and support, someone that needs your support, send it for any reason. It doesn't have to be flowers, a quick text or DM will do. You never know who you might touch with your generosity, just share it around. Here's to another 10 years of Living, Loving and Laughing with you!
Michelle
